What caught my attention this week was The Dark Side of Relationships: Abuse starting page 403. This subject actually really strikes home. I spent five years in a severe aggressive relationship, which the book said was beating, punching or hitting with an object caused by personality disorders, emotional swings and poor-self esteem. In my experience, those terms are so broad, they don't come close to actually describing the reasons why people hurt those they love.
People say, "Why would you stay with them?" We all know the typical, paltry, "I love him/her," response. Unfortunately, there's always more to the story. It isn't just the rut that you've become accustomed to, or the hassle to divorce/move out. It's the fear that you've wasted the last however many years on someone all for nothing. It's the terror that every tear shed has been for naught and every day fighting an uphill battle to save your relationship was folly. No one wants to feel old, but there's nothing worse than feeling like you've wasted your youth.
In the end, I realized that you don't actually have to fight to save your relationship. It's easy to get along. All you have to do is try your best to make your partner happy. If you always put them ahead of yourself and if they're right for you, then they will always put your happiness first, as well. If they don't reciprocate, then they are not right for you. And never ever call names. Once that line is crossed, it's hard to go back.
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